how i survived the first week of graduate school

"At first I was afraid, I was petrified..."

The last couple of weeks was kinda tough because I had to get up real early everyday, drive clear to the other side of town (or ride the bus, or hustle rides), walk into a completely foreign environment, learn my way around in it, try to fit in as best as I can and pay attention to everything (because who knows what might end up being important later). Diving into strange situations and learning to swim is generally something I'm good at that most of the time.

But this past week was the first week of "real" classes. Whew! I knew it would be hard and all, but day-mn! GTEP will kick you in the butt, fo' real. For those of you who are actually wondering, I'm out of the house from 8am-6pm, then I get to come home, eat dinner, read 100 pages a night and fall in bed. It's not like I didn't know what I was getting myself into...I've been watching Margo go through this all this year and I can see how it all pans out in real life. You don't have time for SHIT. But I'm insane and still tutoring some kids on the side. But other than that, I'm not doing any other work. Too tired. I spend my weekends studying, pretty much the whole time and break it up with "fun activities" like chores.

"But then I spent so many nights, thinking how you did me wrong, And I grew strong, And I learned how to get along"

I had to put up with a lot of crap just to get to this point. And although this is one of the hardest things I've ever been through, and in spite of the drowning feeling I have right now, I'm thinking I'll be alright. While I'm just barely treading water in some situations, in others I'm on top of my game. I've gotten really into appreciating the small things in life (like looking out the bus windows at the dogwoods, azaleas and rhododendrons blooming outside), mowing my lawn meditatively with the pushmower, and pretty much anything that's not explicitly school-related.

"Did you think I'd crumble, Did you think I'd lay down and die, Oh no, not I, I will survive...I will survive (hey-hey)"

One day at a time...that's where I'm at these days. One day at a time.

chinese buffet

well we finally tried the chinese buffet up the street. one thing that's been really hard to find in this town is a cheap chinese buffet...oddly enough portland seems to lack this sort of thing and i haven't seen one since the one in chinatown closed. That one wasn't a culinary epicenter either, but for 7 bucks I wasn't about to complain. Besides, sometimes in life all you want is quantity, not necessarily quality. I'll admit that I was a little leery though because the high school kids rave about it (and they think Taco Bell is quality eating), but it's not as bad as I feared. Granted it's not great, but nothing was overwhelmingly greasy, it definitely gets the job done and has a decent variety of things including some vegetarian stuff. The lack of food poisoning ensures that I will be returning in the future. Rock!

CIM-tastic

Grading papers for 7 hours is beyond fun. If you think of fun as a cycle of increasing fun-ness, I've cycled so far along that I'm back to the very beginning of the loop where I'm needing to increase the fun again.

On the plus side I was grading a paper that was so incredibly wonderfully fabulously good that I nearly burst with enthusiasm from the sheer joy of such having had the opportunity to read such well-placed phrases, elaborate yet functional vocabulary and successful and appropriate utilization of complex syntactical structures.

The downside of course is that it is quite possible that I will live a much more satisfying life if I never have the opportunity to read another "Teenage-girl (with flowing-blond hair, blue eyes and a smile as bright as the sun) meets fabulous rich hunky boy, is forbidden to date him (by her over-protective parents), runs away with him, and they live happily ever after with their two perfect angel kids (who naturally never cry and get ear infections)" -type of story. ever again. ever. But I'll never know because unfortunately I read at least 10 of those today. Aiya!

bad writing extravaganza

tomorrow is a grading day, so no students...I'll probably spend most of the afternoon grading papers. I'm sure my eyes will be bleeding by the end of the day, but the practice is good for me.

In case anyone wondered, it's as painful to grade homework as it is to DO homework. Take comfort in that, you tortured students of the world.

(Que si te has preguntado, es tan doloroso marque la preparación como es terminar la preparación. Tomar la comodidad en esto, estudiantes torturado del mundo-por Jose y Christian).

yeah dawg

I'm gonna take a minute to toot my own horn here, but I just found out that I got an A in my lingugistics course. YEAH!!!! Go ME!!! I will preface this shameless self-adulation by acknowledging that this was one of the hardest classes I've taken in a really long tim--and I really had to put in a lot of work and apply myself quite dilligently to keep up with it. As much as I am innately interested in linguistics, it was not something that "clicked" with my brain I didn't always grasp the concepts on the first or even second attempts at trying. I failed many unseen times before "getting" it.

In life there are a lot of things that you can do successfully simply by following the directions...but others require more than that. So I felt really really good when I saw that 4.0 on my transcript...aww yeah.

Park Rose High School

I've been out at Park Rose High School for the past couple of weeks with a group of PSU grad students from the School of Ed. There's a group of 5 of us stationed out there doing our initial observations.

Since my day starts at 6 am and I come home around 5pm, I'm too tired and exhausted to say much about this experience but I will say briefly that it's been extremely rewarding to me overall and given me an awful lot to think about in considering my next moves in becoming a teacher. I have had the chance to get to know and watch a lot of different teachers at their work. I will definitely miss this environment when I'm stuck in classes being a student myself...although I secretly confess I enjoy being a student these days...and even when it's less than thrilling I can still think of a thousand things that would be worse by far.

A teacher asked me today, "Do you get bored just sitting and watching all the time?" My answer would be no, because for one, school is done quite differently nowadays and doesn't resemble in any way shape or form what I experienced, and secondly I am the type of person who finds almost everything in a new environment interesting and worthy of attention. There are so many unfamiliar people to watch and try to figure out, a whole new social system to navigate and a completely unfamiliar environment to try to get "the understanding" of (as Howard would say at a time like this). It's all interesting.

I wish...

I wish I had the time and energy to write about the stuff that I've been thinking about lately...oh well, maybe some day I'll be like Jim Burke and write my own book...I've got plenty of hand-written notes should the dayplanner free up a bit...

Park Rose initium

Here goes, the start of two weeks at Park Rose. I have no idea what to expect. It'll be very interesting I'm sure...The only thing I wish is that I wasn't so far from home, it's a hard place to get to, although not impossible. The bus DOES go there...it just takes FOREVER!

getting out more

Glad I took Christy up on her invite and went to the musical potluck over at Columbia Villa. I had no idea there was a cohousing group so close to PCC, and really enjoyed meeting a bunch of interesting new people. Since I'm in grad school, I'm too busy and tired to get out much so I'm glad that I took a chance and stuck my head out the door.

spring tonic

Here's my recipe for the soup that I whipped up for dinner tonight as a spring tonic: Chickweek and Potato Soup

Chickweed (Stellaria media) is a common "weed" that is of interest to herbalists. "The young leaves when boiled can hardly be distinguished from spring spinach, and are equally wholesome". I've got a bunch of succulent specimins growing underneath my bedroom window on the shady side of the house so I got a hankering to eat them for dinner (like any other self-respecting former Declerye resident). So for the curious, here's the recipe:

Chickweed and Potato Soup (serves 4)
Ingredients:
1-2 qts of chickweed packed into a bowl (1 qt if this is your first encounter with chickweed, 2 if you know you like it)
1/2 carton of potato soup (your choice, I'm fond of Imagine Foods Potato Leek myself)
1 c. plain soy milk, milk or buttermilk
1 tsp mild vinegar (if using buttermilk, omit vinegar)
1 medium potato grated
1/2 c. chopped green onions, chives, leek tops or garlic tops
1-2 tsp salt
1 tbsp olive oil or butter
1 tbsp white wine (optional)

Method:
1. chop chickeed fine or use a food processor. Because of the stems you want it to be pretty well chopped.
2. Heat half of the potato soup on medium heat and add the chickweed and the grated potato. Once that's cooking, add the milk, salt, and olive oil (and wine if you have any). Stir and let simmer for about 10-15 minutes.
3. Thin with water if needed.
4. Once the grated potato is no longer translucent and seems cooked, add the green onions and turn the heat down low.
5. After 5 minutes it should be done. Dish out into bowls and top with additional green onions, nutritional yeast or grated cheese as desired.

Serve with bread if you got it.

i went there

Myspace surveys--lame but strangely addictive. I'm gonna indulge.

1. What time did you get up this morning?
Somewhere between 8 and 9. Woke up to the neighbor's loud ass kids getting in a car right outside my window. Way too perky for that hour of the morning.

2. Diamonds or Pearls? Neither, I prefer powertools.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? 300. All the kids at Marshall were carryin' on about this movie so I had to see what the fuss was about. IMO this was one of the goriest movies I've ever seen. Are Greek stories always this didactic or is it just this interpretation? Very bokurashii which explains it's appeal to 15 year old boys.

4. What is your favorite TV show? Battlestar Galactica but that's on a hiatus so I'll have to get into something else. Generally I watch the Simpsons or Family guy if they're on but not religiously.

5. What did you have for breakfast? a big bowl of grits

6. What is your middle name? you either know it or you don't.

7. What is your favorite cuisine? I like a whole lot of things...probably my faves are Indian food, Vietnamese, Japanese but reality is that I eat everything.

8. What foods do you dislike? things that are greasy or full of chemicals.

9. Your favorite Potato chip? I prefer corn chips, specifically Sabrositas.

10. What cd have you been listening to lately? I tend to listen to the random shuffle on my Ipod but the most recent CD I listened to was the Gypsy Kings.

11. What kind of car do you drive? I ride the bus most of the time but have a 93 Chevy that passed inspection by some miracle of god and still runs.

12. Favorite sandwich? grilled cheese, a timeless classic that never gets old. As Cristin says, it's a friend of the masses and what am I if not "the masses"?

13. What characteristics do you despise? I dislike people who talk on their cell phones in public (like I really want to hear all your personal business!), people who are constantly spitting everywhere (that's a big problem here and I think it's sooo gross), people who stand next to me and start smoking (maybe I need a no smoking sign to wear constantly), and people who think that because I"m white I want to hear their racist crap.

14. What are your favorite clothes? jeans and tshirts haven't lost their charm yet.

15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you
go? I'd like to see a lot more of southeast Asia.

16. Favorite brand of clothing? Considering that most of my clothes are secondhand, it's not a concern. Finding something that fits is a much more consuming concern.

17. Where would you want to retire? Hell I ain't gonna retire for years so who knows. Where is not all that important...just so long as I can have a one acre farm and make gallons of wine.

18. Favorite time of day? Late afternoon.

19. Where were you born? Like I'm disclosing that in such a public place...sheesh!

20. What is your favorite sport to watch? I watch football and college basketball when they're in season but my favorite is the world cup matches.

21. n/a

22. n/a

23. Pepsi or Coke? I've totally sworn off sodas

24. Beavers or Ducks? I live in Oregon but don't give a shit because I didn't grow up here. I probably still wouldn't give a shit because I'm all about whoever is the underdog in a given game.

25. Are you a morning person or night owl? I was a night owl for years but the evil cruel world forced me to be a morning person and now I've come to peace with that.

26. Pedicure or Manicure? either would be nice but in reality ain't neither one gonna be happenin' around here.

27. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share? I start grad school tomorrow.

28. What did you want to be when you were little? a pirate

29. What is your best childhood memory? living in Japan

30. Ever been toilet papering? No, it's a waste of perfectly good toilet paper.

31. Been in a car accident? yes, nothing major

32. Favorite restaurant? my all time favorite is Pho Hoa Bin in Memphis.

33. Favorite flower? I don't have just one favorite

34. Favorite ice cream? bergey's dairy had the best icecream in the world. tillamook isn't bad either.

35. From whom did you get your last e-mail? no idea.

36. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Rural King in Owensboro KY or Gi Joes.

37. n/a

38. Last person you went to dinner with? lindsay's birthday

39. What is one way you make the day go by faster at work? Youtube! ;)
When you work in schools though, you don't want the day to go any faster than it already is... ;)

24 little hours

It's so hard to believe that grad school starts tomorrow...It's kind of mind-boggling that I'm standing on the threshhold of everything that i've been bustin' ass for for the past couple of years. (If you want to get right down to it's probably been even longer because I first got the notion to get into teaching around 2002 and everything that happened after that kinda led up to me realizing that was where I needed to be).

All those long hard frustrating days trying to climb the mountain and here I am standing here above the clouds getting ready to make my final climp to the top (graduation and licensure). It's just amazing how many times I've fallen and had to pick myself back up and keep going...

I got some inspiring books to read over spring break to get in the right frame of mind for what's coming next. The best one though was the one i never would have suspected. It's a slim volume put out by Kappa Delta called Star Teacher of Children in Poverty. It looked unassuming to be sure, but I don't recall the last time I was so inspired by reading a book about teaching. This feller sure knows how to cut through the crap like a hot knife through butter. I used to actually think I was crazy sometimes trying to function in a very bureaucratic world that has some very inhuman ideas about what education should consist of, but here it is, half of the things that I consider important pieces of my understanding about life all laid bare. It's as foundational to my understanding of what I do as Madogiwa Tottochan. That was a good disovery to make up there in the stacks.

Well I'm gonna try my best to throw any preconcieved ideas about what to expect out the window and just try to go with it and see what happens out there. It oughta be interesting.