quote of the day

..."How [do] we stand up, as bloggers, and say, “I am a man,” just like all those Americans have had to do before us and strike down our boss man’s plantation reality. Strike down their manufactured reality and replace it with reality deeply rooted in truth and justice for all Americans. We have to start telling our own stories.

You’re a blogger so you’re halfway there."

Mbair at Daily Kos

ick

I'm totally sick. Could be worse, the only place I have to go all week is PSU, which will be hell for sure, but I can force myself to endure it.
I don't dare miss any class though, I'm liable to get left behind.

I was feelin' fine, then blam...

Don't know where this shit came from. All I can figure out is that some virus musta blew up my nose with all the dust and shit that's swirling around in the east winds.
I was having a good day--here I was not working anywhere, hanging out at Tiny's in the afternoon trying to masterthe finer points of Phonology (which I admit I still suck at), but I noticed that I kept sneezing. By evening I was flat on my ass with a raging sinus inferno of snot. Uggh. Nice way to end the weekend...

Incidentally the people downstairs sure were nice and loud. Videogames at 3am, yum. A lot of sirens too. What the fuck can you do at 3 in the morning 'sides cause some trouble? I would rather have been sound asleep myself, but it wasn't on the menu that night.

what language are we speaking?

so i got maybe 4 hours of sleep...and tried to go to class, just the same. i made it there but i don't know what if anything i got out of it. every time someone said something to me, it was impossible to understand. i kept going "huh"? between blowing my nose over and over. The professor might as well have been lecturing in finnish. I don't think my poor brain was capable of recieving more than 10% of the available input.

After class was over I went home and crawled back in bed. I know when to quit...

geting out more--sort of

(note there's some especially strong language in here for me, and I'll be talking a lot more shit than I usually do, blame it on the fact that I'm really sick and not feeling too patient with life at the moment)

I'm getting close to that age where I'm fixin' to turn into a complete curmudgeon. You get to a point in your life where you no longer want to go out anymore, and I'm rapidly closing in on it. I'm almost to the point where I figure, "Why bother"? Every time I get a notion to go somewhere for recreational purposes, I get stuck surrounded by the dregs of society-all of the unwashed, chainsmokin', cellphone yappin' meth-ed out, inconsiderate hordes. Shit, what do I need that for? I get enough of that as it is...

But then again I wouldn't miss riotfolk for anything in the world either. So I shuffle out in the cold dragging brian along, after all it's close to home. The venue was In Other Words, a feminist bookstore up the street, right by PCC. I figured I could handle a show at a small venue. I can't do bars at all anymore, it's just too much. But that would assume I have some bus skills. Man I sure don't. Everyone one of the 3 buses that come up williams went flying past me just as i was halfway to the stop. jeeeezus! what kind of cruel joke is this?

Eventually we made it. I could have been later and I still would have been fine. The show was good as they always are. I think my favorite song mighta been "tree of life" that just really resonated with me... And seriously it WAS a good show, and reminds me of how I used to have a lot more of this sort of thing in my life...except for the audience, which I will make a point of dissing. Most people of course know how to act in public, but there's always a few individuals who know how to ruin any public engagement. Here's our lovely contestants for the prize of Portland's biggest idiot.

First you have cellphone guy. You know the one. You are at a show trying to listen to an acoustic performance and some jackass just HAS to be sitting next to you talking on their cell phone-the WHOLE FUCKING TIME. Jesus, why leave the house if all you are gonna do when you are out is talk on your damn phone, which you could just as easily do in the privacy of your OWN hovel? I'll admit that already I tend to be negatively biased when it comes to most public cellphone users anyway--like anyone really wants to hear you describe your pathetic life in public. I guarantee you I'd rather NOT know all the details of your wild fling or your dog's erection, or what you're going to do now that you're out of jail, or the finer points of the last shareholder's meeting. WHO GIVES A SHIT? I know it may surprise you but I really could CARE LESS. Unfortunately since you are practically shouting, your business has just become my business...If I was smart I'd start recording people, I'm sure there's a good use for this sort of information even if it's just to make performance art making a statement about the glut of COMPLETE IDIOTS in our society. On a similar note, if you are one of those people who just goes to shows just for the social scene, do us all a favor and take your social gossip hour outside so the rest of us can LISTEN TO THE FUCKING MUSIC IN PEACE without hearing YOU.

Next up on our reality show: the unwashed. Now don't get me wrong, I don't subscribe to the typical western notions of "personal hygiene" that is typically proselytized by the manufacturers of perfumy-tested on animals-chemical-laden personal hygiene products where we are all expected to conform to someting akin to hospital sterility. BUT, if you smell just like a compost bin in July in Memphis, that's just not gonna cut it for a trips over the property line. If you leave the room and your smell stays behind, that's just not copacetic. I realize that homeless people usually have this issue and it's fine, they're homeless, no one expects them to smell like fucking roses when they don't have any likely means to do so. We all are familiar with that smell that crusty punks get, and that's fine if you believe that it's appropriate to smell more human than chemical, but past a certain point it's just nauseating to endure, and if you have running water in your dwelling unit you really don't have any fucking excuse. Please make a note of it, hose off at least once a week, that's all I'm really asking. You'd think as much as it rains here it would have happened for you already...

And our final contestant: Skidmark Sam, the Shit My Pants Guy: If you have chronic severe bowel trauma maybe you should reconsider plans that involve leaving the comfort of your own home. Really it's better that way I would think both for your comfort AND mine. If this isn't a permanent disability, then I'm going to assume you are just lazy. If the wafting smell next to me reeks suspiciously of diarrhea, I'm gonna assume you need to find a toilet and fast, so FOR THE LOVE OF GOD get up and go to the restroom. Stop torturing yourself (and me). Indoor plumbing makes it possible to do this sort of thing conveniently, or so I've heard.
And maybe you should reconsider eating whatever god-awful thing it was that got you into this fix. Based on the power of the smell I'd assume it was a bean/cabbage/hog intestine medley.

Well thanks to all of our lovely contestants, I will strongly reconsider the merits of leaving the house for non-work/non-school reasons. After all, why bother when going out in public means having to be around the public?

geting out more--sort of

(note there's some especially strong language in here for me, and I'll be talking a lot more shit than I usually do, blame it on the fact that I'm really sick and not feeling too patient with life at the moment)

I'm getting close to that age where I'm fixin' to turn into a complete curmudgeon. You get to a point in your life where you no longer want to go out anymore, and I'm rapidly closing in on it. I'm almost to the point where I figure, "Why bother"? Every time I get a notion to go somewhere for recreational purposes, I get stuck surrounded by the dregs of society-all of the unwashed, chainsmokin', cellphone yappin' meth-ed out, inconsiderate hordes. Shit, what do I need that for? I get enough of that as it is...

But then again I wouldn't miss riotfolk for anything in the world either. So I shuffle out in the cold dragging brian along, after all it's close to home. The venue was In Other Words, a feminist bookstore up the street, right by PCC. I figured I could handle a show at a small venue. I can't do bars at all anymore, it's just too much. But that would assume I have some bus skills. Man I sure don't. Everyone one of the 3 buses that come up williams went flying past me just as i was halfway to the stop. jeeeezus! what kind of cruel joke is this?

Eventually we made it. I could have been later and I still would have been fine. The show was good as they always are. I think my favorite song mighta been "tree of life" that just really resonated with me... And seriously it WAS a good show, and reminds me of how I used to have a lot more of this sort of thing in my life...except for the audience, which I will make a point of dissing. Most people of course know how to act in public, but there's always a few individuals who know how to ruin any public engagement. Here's our lovely contestants for the prize of Portland's biggest idiot.

First you have cellphone guy. You know the one. You are at a show trying to listen to an acoustic performance and some jackass just HAS to be sitting next to you talking on their cell phone-the WHOLE FUCKING TIME. Jesus, why leave the house if all you are gonna do when you are out is talk on your damn phone, which you could just as easily do in the privacy of your OWN hovel? I'll admit that already I tend to be negatively biased when it comes to most public cellphone users anyway--like anyone really wants to hear you describe your pathetic life in public. I guarantee you I'd rather NOT know all the details of your wild fling or your dog's erection, or what you're going to do now that you're out of jail, or the finer points of the last shareholder's meeting. WHO GIVES A SHIT? I know it may surprise you but I really could CARE LESS. Unfortunately since you are practically shouting, your business has just become my business...If I was smart I'd start recording people, I'm sure there's a good use for this sort of information even if it's just to make performance art making a statement about the glut of COMPLETE IDIOTS in our society. On a similar note, if you are one of those people who just goes to shows just for the social scene, do us all a favor and take your social gossip hour outside so the rest of us can LISTEN TO THE FUCKING MUSIC IN PEACE without hearing YOU.

Next up on our reality show: the unwashed. Now don't get me wrong, I don't subscribe to the typical western notions of "personal hygiene" that is typically proselytized by the manufacturers of perfumy-tested on animals-chemical-laden personal hygiene products where we are all expected to conform to someting akin to hospital sterility. BUT, if you smell just like a compost bin in July in Memphis, that's just not gonna cut it for a trips over the property line. If you leave the room and your smell stays behind, that's just not copacetic. I realize that homeless people usually have this issue and it's fine, they're homeless, no one expects them to smell like fucking roses when they don't have any likely means to do so. We all are familiar with that smell that crusty punks get, and that's fine if you believe that it's appropriate to smell more human than chemical, but past a certain point it's just nauseating to endure, and if you have running water in your dwelling unit you really don't have any fucking excuse. Please make a note of it, hose off at least once a week, that's all I'm really asking. You'd think as much as it rains here it would have happened for you already...

And our final contestant: Skidmark Sam, the Shit My Pants Guy: If you have chronic severe bowel trauma maybe you should reconsider plans that involve leaving the comfort of your own home. Really it's better that way I would think both for your comfort AND mine. If this isn't a permanent disability, then I'm going to assume you are just lazy. If the wafting smell next to me reeks suspiciously of diarrhea, I'm gonna assume you need to find a toilet and fast, so FOR THE LOVE OF GOD get up and go to the restroom. Stop torturing yourself (and me). Indoor plumbing makes it possible to do this sort of thing conveniently, or so I've heard.
And maybe you should reconsider eating whatever god-awful thing it was that got you into this fix. Based on the power of the smell I'd assume it was a bean/cabbage/hog intestine medley.

Well thanks to all of our lovely contestants, I will strongly reconsider the merits of leaving the house for non-work/non-school reasons. After all, why bother when going out in public means having to be around the public?

Today was a good day

Wow, y'all, today was pretty good...
Just waking up in the morning gotta thank god, I dont know but today seems kinda odd,
No barking from the dogs, no smog...no buggin', no phone's ringing, nothing beeping, and I couldn't even hear the trash trucks bangin' and slammin',
I got outta bed and had somethin' to eat, then realized it was time to hit tha street,
Hooked it up on later as I hit the do', Thinking will I live, another twenty-fo',
You gotta wonder with the way people drive, takin' on cellphones and all that jive,
I cant believe, today was a good day,
I made it to class at nine on the dime, found a good seat and, made it on time,
got all kindsa answers to questions that were burnin', keepin' me up late with my pages turnin',
Didnt even get no static from the cowards,
Cause just yesterday them fools tried to blast me,
Saw the police and they rolled right past me,
Got them kids to hit the books, stop messin' around an' givin' each other looks,
They wrote their papers and practiced their lines,
And e'rybody even showed up on time,
Plus nobody I know got killed in SE Portland today,
Today was a good day,
Today I didnt even have to use my A.K.,
My superpowers were all I needed for a change
I got to say it was a good day.
Hey wait, wait a minute fool, Stop the shit, What the fuck am I thinking about?
So maybe it wasn't quite as good as the Ice Cube song I was thinkin' about, but I'll take it just the same, everything went really well for a change and I felt like I was on top of my game.
But maybe it was just because the sun was out for the first time in a real long time...

ewwww!

it's been a long time since i've run into anything that reminds me so utterly that we're living in a fucked up world, but daymn! there were some NASTY lil' hoes up on that train tonight...as if the place weren't hype enough these shameless lil' skankahoochies from BEAVERTON had to get up in the mix too (now you expect this sort of thing out past 82nd but come on, we still in the suburbs, sheeyit). i won't even repeat the dialog i had to witness because someone from FOX might take off runnin' after these lil' hoes wanting to put them in their own reality show, but let's just say, "baby i know yo' mamas won't proud of you today!"
gross!

freeforms

today is oh so bleak and grey,
as grainy as the reception on "the bad channel" just for the two of us left in the world who don't do cable,
the wind hit me like a couple of line backers, the cold makes my nose sniffle incessantly and my hands dive into my pocket as soon as i step out the door,
the sky is full of wispy thin clouds that drift menacingly, they indicate trouble is ahead and soon,
familiar faces were what i was in search of when i climbed the steps,
in order to leave the orderly life,
and the special delivery of bad news that comes even when the postman doesn't,
inertia is pulling me down into a spiral of aching feet and aching legs,
sprawled out at the bus stop on MLK wondering which end of the universe i really belong to,
when i pull the veil up it falls,
into a broken wind and a sea of loneliness,
winter is a time for sleeping, but i am awake in the last hours of freedom
before monday crashes down on my head,
sundays are like snooze buttons, the time passes all too quickly before something comes and jars and pokes at your brain saying, "baby you gotta wake up, ain't nobody gonna wait for you this time."

teacup lake

sarah talked us into going cross country skiing at teacup lake. i have a big fat blister on my heel but i had sooo much fun. i'd never been cross country skiing before in my life (like most southerners, I grew up without this sort of experience), so this was a whole new thing for me, but I got the hang of it after awhile and only fell down a couple of times, which isn't bad for me. later on, sitting around a woodstove on top of a snow covered mountain when i was too tired to move was just as fun in it's own way, i swear if i had a woodstove, i could ride out the winter anywhere, no matter how snowy...crossing mt hood was just amazing. i can't go up there myself, so i don't have the means to do this very often. it is so incredibly beautiful being in a place where there's 4+ ft of pristine white powdery snow coating every fir and cedar tree for miles and miles.

what did you want to be when you grew up?

While many people have jobs they love, very few of us grew up wanting to be Web Designers, Actuaries, or Customer Service Professionals. Tell us, what did you want to be when you grew up?

a)Astronaut or Jet Pilot
b)Doctor or Nurse
c)Teacher
d)Firefighter or Police Officer
e)A Star!
f)Everything - I changed my mind weekly!

When I was a kid, what I wanted to be "when I grew up" changed all the time. It really depended on who or what I was exposed to at the time. Occupational choices changed weekly. A persistent theme was science and exotic settings.

In high school when people started asking me "What do you want to do with your life", I would start getting flippant and say, "I want to be a PIRATE" (hoping they'd take the hint that I didn't know or care what my future career path was). I really always wanted the chance to explore more and to try different things-not get pigeonholed into doing something respectable.

For a while I wanted to apply my cultural knowledge, love of research and language skills by going into foreign service, diplomacy, or work for an NGO. In the process of pursuing that, however, I discovered that I really like teaching, and that I prefer being around kids over being around adults.

So when I grow up (still working on that mindset), I want to be an ESL teacher. I've spent the past couple of years working towards that and have never been happier. I can't think of anything I'd rather get paid to do with my time, and will admit that I love being able to do something socially meaningful with my various skills. One thing that I think is important is doing the kind of work that makes a difference in the world, and teaching is where it's at.

wow

yay, it's a long lost raven!
blame it on jayme mind you, it's all her fault, but it's nice to find an old friend out there in cyberspace, very exciting indeed!
While we're on the subject, I've lost an EVA and don't know where to find her. sniff sniff. she was my oldest friend and we've managed to keep up with each other despite our nomadic ways, but this time I think I've lost her, when she moved mysteriously to Pennsylvania and didn't leave any info. I hesitate to post her specs online but I'm getting sorely tempted, so Evangeline, if you are out there, I miss you please let me know you are alive and well...

postscript

so after stumbling around taking pictures all afternoon, i went and hung out at tiny's for awhile. then i went over to the bank. on the way back, i saw this crazy old skool bus that looks just like one of those RVTD specials that does the ashland run. but it wasn't the #10. just some crazy kids throwing snowballs at each other. the front says MOBILE GROOVE BOMB and back in my younger and crazier days i totally would have hopped aboard this peter pan ride to the unknown...but alas i am getting old and don't feel as up for adventures as i once was.

i think part of me will always wonder though...

pictures of snow in portland 1月16日2007年初雪

Another view of downtown Portland from the east bank esplanade.
Happy Snow Day, everybody!

pictures of snow in portland 1月16日2007年初雪

A view of downtown Portland from the east side of the steel bridge.

pictures of snow in portland 1月16日2007年初雪

Streets in downtown Portland look about as bad as on our side of the river...

pictures of snow in portland 1月16日2007年初雪

This is a picture of I-5 in North Portland. Notice how there's almost no traffic at 9am, a most unusual thing indeed. About the only thing I saw moving besides a few stray cars was UPS trucks. Go UPS. ;)

pictures of snow in portland 1月16日2007年初雪

Here is our street in NE Portland all covered with powdery snow, a most unusual sight in Portland, OR (where it almost never snows).
My roommate got out her skiis and did some cross-country skiing around the neighborhood.
Guess who doesn't have school today? (hee hee)

yay snow!

i can't believe it but it SNOWED! (so exciting)
there will be a longer follow up post later, I'm going back out to play some more before it's gone, this is a rare event for this part of the world.

phonetics

phonetics is kickin' my butt, ya'll. ugggh. I'd almost rather be doing the report on petroleum right about now.

samui da yo

man we're freezing our little butts off here in portland, fo' real. I spent the whole day huddled up under blankets and still felt cold. At least the football games were good. I was glued to the colts/ravens game all afternoon. This was reward enough for not having to work on saturday, the first time i've been at home all day on a saturday in a really really long time. i finally finished reading a storm of swords today. i left the homework alone for the most part because i figure i have all day sunday to look at it, and man that stuff is haaaaaard.
i am so over January already. it's no fun at all when you don't have a woodstove, or even the friendly whistle of a radiator to keep you company. instead we have the howling wind and some rather pathetic attempts at staying warm/awake/alive. winter is a season of struggle for me. the s.a.d. is kickin' in hardcore.

hibernate

why fight the cold? why not give in to these grizzly bear impulses and hibernate 'til green things thing start pushing back out of the earth again. sheeyit, i even look like a grizzy bear with my 6 shirts and three pairs of pants...
it's even cold inside the house, and my nose is running. the radiator is fighting a losing battle against the cold cold outside. i'm suprised i don't see clouds everytime i breathe out. on the plus side, i have the world's biggest cold storage right outside on the porch.

overheard recently: "prettier than the buttlickers from booblesteen, how pretty that is"

brrr. co---old! i'm going to go cuddle up with something warm and friendly now.

the NOT snow day

so much for the so-called snow day. word is that it did snow somewhere, but everywhere i've been it's been sunny and clear, not a speck of snow anywhere. i think i've currently got more "snow" in my freezer than exists in all of downtown portland.

naturally the buses were 20 minutes late and schools were closed just the same, because PPS closes at the drop of a hat. i'm sure there were a lot of happy kids running around town but at PSU things went on as normal. i could have used a break from tiny cramped desks but no such luck. oh well, as the saying goes, I'm paying for it...

eating lunch with brian after class was fun though. that's a new experience for me. my class is right down the street from his office and ends around noon, so i met up with him for lunch, something i have never really done before. this is one benefit of the new way of life that i find myself in.
then normally i'd be off to tutoring. instead i tried to go see if i could find j.......but i can't remember where her office was. i ended up talking to m..... and she said c....... got a $240 bike ticket during a sting operation. that's gotta hurt. i hope they are able to challenge this successfully in court because that's pretty lame.

my first night of tai chi got cancelled due to lack of snow...i guess. it's just as well, i really don't feel very good at the moment anyway. i'm gonna stay away from doing anything with beaverton tomorrow either, which is too bad because the classroom next door to the one i was at on monday has two listings and i really get a kick out of the ISC kids, they're a nice bunch and a lot of fun to hang out with for a day (i envy the girl who's doing student teaching there, that would be a fun assignment), and double plus plus--it's an easy school to get to via public transit. oh well, that's life. it's still there, but i really think i should recuperate, my energy level is at an all time low, and i can't touch caffeine which i really need for situations involving K-6.

oh well. i'm glad it's friday though, i need to regroup and try some new approaches next week.

odd bits

today's been kind of a strange day. but then again it's been a strange week.

i'm tutoring a student who is writing a paper on "prayer in public schools" which is an interesting topic. naturally in this situation it is decidely best for me to keep my opinions to myself, but it brings up a lot of interesting memories for me about my school days and issues of religious expression.
let's just preface all of this by mentioning that part of my schooling was spent in the south. and not just anywhere but spittin' distance from the land of pat robertson and jerry fallwell. needless to say but i'm sure if you've read any of my writings you could assume that there are few things we'd agree on, me and those two fellers.
a consequence of living in such a patently religious community was that schooling had a decidedly christian-right influenced religious flavor sometimes--and in some ways--although not always. some teachers were obviously religious and others were better at maintaining the kind of neutrality the supreme court likes to see in a public school. some teachers would slide some religious discussion in with their content areas. and i went to the kind of school where we had "moments of silence" and the christian students had prayer circles from time to time. we also had prayers at some after school events and graduation.
did any of this particularly bother me? not really, although it could get hokey from time to time. but i could defend myself adequately in this environment when necessary when the southern baptists got a bit too carried away with themselves in a zeal to save my soul. "you must be a devil worshipper!" yeah, you MUST be right, why don't you give yourself a pat on the back because you are obviously so observant. i'm not gonna give you a fullblown essay on the topic of prayer in school, but i will say that public expressions of faith don't particularly bother me, i just don't like intolerance. intolerance in any form is odious to me.
ironically when i taught adult reading, there were no restrictions on religious discussion in the classroom since it was not a public school or a captive audience situation, so we would do this regularly. of course we also freely talked about politics and other controversial issues. i kind of enjoyed having the freedom to have these discourses and feel like having an open environment to talk about otherwise suppressed aspects of adult life made our classroom environment more interesting. of course this requires a certain consensus to keep things civil, which i realize is not possible in all situations. as a teacher i'm sure this issue will come up over and over again , and i'll have to think long and hard how to deal with it, but i think i tend to lean towards the side of openness of expression. but since i personally get tired of racial slurs and homophobia and am perfectly willing to speak out against these, students who go off on some kind of rant can expect me to clamp down on anything that strays beyond the boundaries of civil discourse.

on a completely different note, on the way home i found a couple of really nice ED books Educational Psychology and What Is It About Me You Can't Teach?: An Instructional Guide for the Urban Educator at goodwill and bunch of striped toe-socks. i'm a happy camper now. and i finally got to talk to my friend j-- who i've been locked in a vicious game of phone tag with.

another rainy sunday

Yep, it's Sunday and typical of Portland the wind is whipping the spruce tree in a frenzy and rain is pouring out of the sky like water out of a janitor's bucket. Water drips off the eaves, runs down the windows, splatters on the pavement and trickles off the powerlines outside the porch. Cars swish through the street and the squirrels are not out today. It's probably cold as well, but I sure ain't gonna be the one to go outside and find out for myself. Sitting here on the couch is about my speed for the day.

Last night was our end of season party/going away party and after driving around lost around 185th (note to self: this is exactly why I hate the suburbs, it's hard as shit to find anything) we got to OSF and it was packed to the gills. I haven't seen so many white people in one building since the last gun show I went to. Oh yeah. The crowd of shiny dresses and corsages and awkward looking teenage boys would be the victims of winter formal. The only consolation was that it wasn't the aftermath of a junior high dance or those squealing girls would be much worse. 8th grade girls shriek like nothing else you've ever heard. There was still plenty of giggling and camera flashes.
It kinda hit home for me while we were sitting around shootin' the shit, that this was it, and I'm actually gonna miss kickin' it with these guys. It's a weird feeling. My last Saturday was pretty uneventful--there was only a steady trickle of postal customers, a few drop offs, some copy jobs and boxholders checking their mail. It never got busy at all. I only had one packing job that was even remotely interesting and it went into a normal box without much intervention. The only weird thing that happened all day is some ladies paid for a $16 job with nickels and dimes...every cashier's nightmare. We were gonna go next door and watch the Colts/Dallas game but they were watching a soccer game...I went over to Sunrise and discovered I could still get an eggnog latte...for the same price as my usual coffee. Then 3pm rose up fast and I gathered up all my stuff and headed for the barn.

Today is interesting in that I don't feel all frantic like usual. The only challenge I have is to pick up something off the wire for tomorrow that doesn't involve having to drive anywhere. After all my car is hopelessly barricaded in the driveway by sarah's subaru, whose alarm cannot be disabled by any normal means. I made this pleasant discovery when I tried to go to Highland Park on Friday and woke up the whole damn neighborhood. I had the keys and the alarm control in hand, but could not turn the damn thing off, much less get the car to move. Fortunately I barely drive anywhere under normal circumstances, but this means that I definitely won't be driving anything anywhere until sarah gets back from Europe.

I guess the other project today is looking through the benefits packet. And maybe organizing my various school folders. They're a bit unruly after the aftermath of December and I haven't bothered to organize them for the new quarter. Later I'll get motivated to make some stuffed shells. I'm stuffing them with chard which is growing happily out in the garden...which I would imagine is a rather wet place right now. Maybe I should reconsider this idea in favor of staying dry.

So another week comes and goes. New things are on the horizon for next week. This is one of those years that probably won't be quiet...but it oughta be rather interesting.

well its done

as of today no more boxes, faxes, next day airs, shoddily packed parcels, certified letters, customs forms or lectures about shipping illicit substances. after a short hiatus, i get to play student again, and chances are its gonna be with real live undergraduates who are still minors (gasp)! this outta be REAL interesting, but hey I already spend my days around teens--and that doesnt phase me either. since this isnt an education course there will be real finals for a change and no one will be terribly interested in my stories about teen behavior, and i doubt it will be as interactive as what i have become accustomed to, but i could be wrong on any of these points. so instead of complaining about logistical nightmares, i get to have student-like concerns again. that oughta be an interesting change of pace for this old jaded soul.

i turned in my keys and uniform shirts. no more getting out of bed at 7 am on saturday morning, unless for some crazy reason i get a hankering for it.

American Teenagers

The 10th graders are reading Persepolis in English class, but they don't have their own copies of the book yet. Since they are apparently studying about Iran in world history class, I've been working on their background knowledge and getting them geared up to think about how the events of the 1979 revolution compare with things they've actually heard of--or how different their circumstances are from a typical Persian teenager. When they got done with their science homework, we had a discussion on typical teenage past times (so we could compare them with the interests of teens in Iran), and started thinking about how the Fundamentalist regime resembles other types of facism that they are more familiar with.

This is one of the more interesting topics they've had since I've known them. It oughta make for some interesting discussion once they start actually reading the book.

crappidity crappity crap

wow, did today suck or what? it was like my worst nightmare...or eeriely similar to the plot of "Clerks".

it was super busy today. people came flying up outta the woodwork with all kindsa business for me to deal with. which was fine until I got left alone. it's not like christmas was that long ago, so I've still got my multitasking skills going pretty strong, but sure enough, 1:30 comes and 1:30 goes, and no one ever shows up. 1:45. 2:00pm. fuck. nobody was planning on coming. "But I'm not even supposed to bee heeereee!" Call it's my clerks moment, here I am stuck manning the store alone. I can't believe this crap.

time capsule 1/1/06

Current mood :: sedate, wistful, reflective.
Current music :: i've been listening to cesaria evora a lot this week. the novelty still hasn't worn off.
Current taste :: soups and pasta. winter's staples.
Current hair :: washed it a couple days ago. it's hiding under a blue bandana that jose likes because it reminds him of the crips. (like i give a toss about gangs, i'm an old married woman).
Current clothes :: it's cold, i'm wearing like 5 shirts at least. none of them are even remotely chosen for fashion related reasons. my feet are still cold. winter sucks.
Current annoyance :: the end of the holidays means it's back to the grind.
Current smells :: the house smells like tomato sauce and garlic. thank you brian for making dinner. i love so much.
Current thing I ought to be doing :: cleaning the house some more, or organizing my endless piles of stuff. so much stuff. uggh.
Current windows open :: MS Word, yahoo mail.
Current desktop picture:: a wedding picture, it's been the same for a million years.
Current favorite band :: i never get tired of this bike is a pipe bomb
Current book :: 13 ways of looking at student teaching/a clash of kings (fun reading)
Current cd in stereo :: orisha
Current hate :: the weather, it's gross, cold, wet and icky.
Describe your ideal significant other :: I'll describe the reality of my significant other. He's sitting on the couch watching the rose bowl game. He's wearing homer simpson slippers that look like they're eating his feet and a bath robe and sweat pants. He's giggling about something. Silly boy. You are darn cute, though.
Last thing you Bought :: a shit load of stuff at good will. i thought I had scored big and found some nice respectable things to wear to school, but the jokes on me. I gotta take a bunch back and return it because the clothes didn't fit after all...the salwar kameez did fit though. It's pretty.
...Ate :: cookies that i baked last week
...Drank :: black butte porter/deschutes.
...Read :: the book mentioned above
The most embarrassing CD in your collection? :: almost everything i listen to could be described as "embarrasing"
You ate for breakfast? :: today it was grits. that's pretty typical.

coming up next on the discovery channel

Things are about to undergo some kind of metamorphosis around here. There's no telling how different my life could get in the next week, so maybe there'll be more to ponder than the creative writing prompts I've been using due to utter lack of mental energy or of anything inspiring taking place in my life this past month that might be called interesting.

I'm kind of looking forward to shaking things up. Sure there'll be a lot of frustrating moments coming my way, that's to be expected. I guess what I'm most interested in is the possibility of moving some plans off the back burner back into the foreground of this messy composition that I call my life.

And I guess that is, in and of itself, rather exciting. But maybe I shouldn't get too carried away with premature enthusiasm. As master yoda says (life size or otha-wize), "adventure, excitement, a jedi craves not these things". I say, "you get what you deserve", which in my case could be a serious beat down from roller derby team frustration devastation.

So let's see what happens with a complete change of routines, scenery and expectations. It could get interesting alright. Maybe too interesting. I'll have to dust off some old skool moves.

Seven Wonders

"What are your 'Seven Wonders'--or the seven most amazing things your eyes have seen? Describe the places, objects, people or accomplishments in your life that are the most meaningful and life-affirming experiences of your existence?"

1. Personal empowerment through literacy

2. The view of Ashland from the slopes of the Siskiyous

3. All of the things I saw when I lived in Japan

4. Our parties at Declerye

5. That spring comes every year in spite of winter

6. Kids

7. My husband. (it's a wonder he can still put up with me after all this time)

how are you different?

Imagine you are in a room with 50 random strangers. List ten ways that you are PROBABLY different from every stranger in that room, then write a poem that celebrates those differences.

We lived in a commune in the middle of the hood,
Grew our veggies and chopped our wood,
DIY--don't buy it at the store,
We knew the secrets of herbal lore,

Don't really don't know the meaning of home,
Don't have no place that I call my own,
My feet still have the feel of the road in 'em,
The humming sound of pavement sings my anthem,

I ride the bus, don't drive no car,
Rather ride my bike, if I ain't goin' far,
Know how to seek and know where to find,
Being broke rarely leaves me in a bind,

You say "Speak in English please"
But I would rather speak Japanese,
Spanish or Chinese, or whatever you please,
Because all of these sound good to me,

"Act my age?" You must be on drugs,
I rather enjoy dirt and picking up bugs,
Materialism and capitalism are a drag,
Peace and quiet are definitely my jag,

I may be different but don't you mind,
We may not be of the same sort or kind,
But don't mind difference, because it's just fine,
We just different colors, standing in line, all fittin' in the same rainbow

One year down, another to go

Happy New Year folks. On that note, here's the list:

Five Best things that happened (to me) in 2006

1. Started at BSD: that's been a great experience and helped me refine a lot of my ideas about what's out there and what to look for in a teaching job.
   
   
2. Sauvie Island: spending almost all of my days off lurking around Sauvie Island has definitely been a good thing. It's a good antidote for being cooped up in the city all the time and I never get tired of driving down the road eating blackberries and raspberries, looking at the mountains off on the horizon.
   
   
3. Meeting new people: It's not easy to meet people in Portland, and I'm not the right age to take advantage of many of the social amenities that are available, so I finally bit the bullet and found some people my own age to hang out with.
   
   
4. Losing my wallet on trimet several times and getting it back: That's just amazing and it's more than luck that made it happen , so thank you to all the kind souls who found it in your hearts to make it possible for me to be reunited with my wallet so many times. I will try to be better this year I promise.
   
   
5. Discovering the Esplanade: Living right by it you would think I would have discovered it long ago, but this year was really the first time I got to know and love the East Bank Esplanade.
   
   And now the five worst things about 2006
   
   
   1. Global warming: glad everyone finally noticed it, and that the issue is getting the attention it deserves...but no offense, where the fuck has everyone been? Hellooo? The signs have been there all along. Sheesh. It was really hot here, and almost everyone I know is experiencing it in some way. Going through several weeks of 100 degree weather in a town with no A/C was seriously not pleasant. And this winter hasn't been all that winter-like either. The environmental news is getting downright scary...time to get ready for the apocalypse, me thinks.
      
      
   2. Measure 37 claims: I could have told anyone who had bothered to ask that passing measure 37 was a baaaaaad idea. Now everyone and their uncle who owns a derelict piece of land somewhere is coming out of the woodwork wanting the state to reimburse them for a million dollars because they supposedly were going to build multimillion condos on that piece of shit land. riiiiight. I believe you buddy. God only knows what the fuck people were THINKING when they passed this so called populist measure (that naturally benefits mainly the already wealthy). Oh yeah, they were probably busy smoking weed, that's what people do in Oregon.
      
      
   3. Getting shit on by the evil forces of bureaucracy: Yep, what more can I say other than this was a major theme in 2006 and all I can guess is that administrators at PSU derive some kind of sick pleasure from fucking with me all the time. At least it's not just me, I've heard lots of people have this problem.
      
      
   4. Illness: It seems like everyone including myself has been sick more this year than any in recent memory. Blehhh. If one more person coughs on me I'm gonna kick them.
      
      
   5. Iraq: Okay to be perfectly fair, this crappy situation has been in progress for quite awhile, but is it just me or has the whole mess gotten progressively worse in 2006 making for a rather deadly year for Iraq? And since I have a personal interest in the subject, it goes on my list of things that suck.
      
      
      And now on to 2007----> Five things I'd seriously like to see happen:
      
      
      1. Democrats finally start acting like democrats and undo some of the worst excesses of Bush & Co. I won't hold my breath, but it would be nice if the democratic party gets a notion to take a hint and stop acting like wannabe republicans. No I wouldn't mind a bit.
         
         
      2. The Oregon bottle bill gets updated and moves into the 21st century. Sure it's great that soda cans and beer bottles are a valuable commodity for shopping cart pushers everywhere, but just imagine how much less trash there'd be if all of the water bottles and fruit drink/red bull cans also disappeared off the streets?
         
         
      3. My butt in school. Nuff said. It's about that time.
         
         
      4. Fare enforcement on Trimet--I'm sick of being panhandled all the time. It's getting really old. Besides why should I keep buying a monthly pass when everyone else rides for free?
         
         
      5. Visitors: I wish more people would visit, seriously. We have the best setup for houseguests in the world. Y'all need to take advantage of my couch...