flying with a babe

Having flown solo with babe recently, I have a few thoughts about the whole experience:

ID: I didn't know this, but you will need to bring documents (i.e. birth certificate or copy) to prove your child is under 2 if you don't want to pay for the extra seat (even if the baby is obviously not 2). I just happened to have the medical card with me and that worked for them since it had his name and date of birth on it. Otherwise, who knows if we would have gotten on the plane. You will need this to get a boarding pass for the baby, even without a seat, so plan on bringing it.

Another thing to consider--if you are male flying solo with a baby, it might be a good idea to take a letter from the other parent saying they consent to the travel, and ID proving the child is yours. If you are flying without your spouse and leaving the country have a notarized letter saying your spouse is aware of your trip. Sadly, you never know when you might have an issue around the issue of potential child abduction--and if you're doing an international flight, it's almost always recommended.

Dealing with stuff: DO have someone help you carry all your luggage to the security screening area if possible so you can focus on the babe (and the process of getting your stuff where it needs to be). This is a good time to note that some airlines are more generous than others when it comes to checked luggage. Given the enormous ammount of sheer crap you have to take everywhere a baby goes, you need one that's not too stingy with the baggage allowances.

If no one's available, either flag down one of those guys with a luggage cart, or rent one of those Smart Carts for the time you will spend on the airport. They really help at a time when you will need to do as much with one hand as possible.
In general, you can also count on the kindness of strangers for help with luggage. Flying solo with a baby puts you high on people's assistance radars, and you can count on a bit of help from pretty much everyone that's not a TSA employee...this is a time to ignore the pre-recorded warning about not letting other people carry your luggage.

Carrying the babe through the airport: If your baby is small enough, congratulations, you can use a baby carrier or sling and be hands-free. (Sadly, mine is not) Note, TSA is evil and they will make you take the baby out of the sling when you walk through the metal detector.

If you can't wear the baby, you'll probably need a stroller (or something stroller like). TSA will also make you take your baby out of the stroller and put it on the conveyor belt, which is not the easiest thing to do when holding a baby. That part, my friends, is the SUCKIEST part of the whole experience. I went out and bought an umbrella stroller just for the trip, since there was no way I was taking my fancy-pants jogging stroller on a plane.

Now, if the child walks and talks, then problem solved (unless your child is what we in the business call a "runner", then you may want to consider some sort of restraining device)!

A note about security--this is the part that sucked the most. Some airports allegedly have a separate security line for families, and for obvious reason, it's preferable to go through that line and be surrounded by other parents or understanding adults rather than rushed business travelers or the young and childless who won't understand why you can't take off your shoes, pull out your liquids, break down the stroller, etc in under 30 seconds.

My experience was that there was no magical separate line, probably because I was flying off-peak. So I had to go through with everyone else. Other than the TSA employees, everyone was pretty nice about it. I invited everyone to go ahead of me while I got my stuff out. I wore flipflops so I wouldn't have to fumble with my shoes. I had already cleaned out my pockets, etc so no fumbling around at the last minute. Just dump and go. Still though, it's hard to put your stuff on a conveyor belt and break down a stroller while holding a squirming 27 pound baby.

Now you may be wondering what you do with a stroller once you get ready to get on the plane. For the record, you can gate check strollers for free. It's not part of your luggage allowance. You just show up at the gate, ask to gate check your stroller, and they'll take care of it. You just get it tagged, and then when you get down at the bottom of the ramp, just leave it there, and they'll stow it somewhere. If you're doing a layover somewhere, I recommend NOT checking it through to your destination for two reasons. One, you may need to entertain the baby for a long period of time between flights--walking through a busy airport is a pretty good way of entertaining a baby. Two, you may need to RUN to your connecting flight, and again, having a stroller might help a lot.

On the plane: Try to request the front row. Obviously you'll have to buy your tickets way early to even stand a chance. On the plus side, there's way more room up front, and you could even lay out a little blanket for your kid to roll around on. There isn't room to do that (or much of anything else) in most of other rows. Most airlines let families board first, so you might get your pick of seats.
Now I was flying Southwest, which works a bit like Greyhound--first come, first served. They board over half of the plane *before* they do family boarding, so fuggedaboudit. Since there's no way I was getting anywhere near the front row, I decided to take the opposite tack and sit in the back (near the restroom). Being near the restroom has its advantages...the white noise of the engines is one of them. Besides being louder back there (to muffle my precious darling's cries), you also stand a better chance of getting the whole row to yourself. Especially on an airline like Southwest where people can choose where they're going to sit. If the flight's really crowded, then at least if someone *does* decide to sit next to you, you can be pretty certain that they at least like kids. I prefer an aisle seat because it's easier to get up--and with a baby, you may need to do that A LOT. Might as well cut to the chase and make it easier for everyone. I've also heard that if the plane crashes, the people in the back are more likely to survive.

If you can afford to buy the baby a seat, then good for you. It does make things easier in some ways. You can put your carseat right in there, and voila! However if you have a kid that you know already doesn't do well in the car, or is definitely a lap-baby, then don't waste the money on an extra seat if you're gonna end up holding the kid anyway. Also, you may end up with a open seat next to you anyway...life's often funny that way. I personally wouldn't bother buying an extra seat for baby, the reason being, you can usually bring your carseat all the way to the gate and if there are open seats they will probably allow you to bring it on board, if not they will gate check it for free. Since I'm not loaded with cash, I'm probably going to have a kid in my lap until the magical age of two...

Babes and their ears: As you know, taking off and landing are pretty hard on the ears. Pity, then the poor babe, and plan on nursing (or offering something to drink) for take off and landings. Then you can skip the screams, for the most part.

Packing for the plane: Make sure you pack plenty of food (for both of you) and plenty of diapers. When packing your diaper bag, make sure you plan not just for the extra time of going through security and getting your luggage, but also for the unexpected flight delays (so bring twice as many diapers as you think you might need).

A change of clothes is also a good idea because if the baby pees or spits up on you, you're both stuck in wet clothes. ewww.

For my trip, I packed 2 carry-ons--1 was diapers and toys, the other was a food bag. (The week before we flew, I went and hit the plastic bag return bin at the grocery store to scrounge up some bags for diapers.)

It's good to know that those pesky liquids rules don't apply if you have a baby, so don't worry about how you're going to transport breast milk or formula--just go for it. (You can read more about that on the TSA website.) If you use formula or pumped breast milk, you can usually bring as much as you need. It's a good idea to put whatever you're using in gallon-sized clear plastic bags for ease of inspection. A final hint about formula--it's really hard to make formula on the plane (especially if you're going to have a baby in your lap while doing so), so what I did is pre-measure the powder in the bottles before leaving for the airport--then all you gotta do is add water when you need it. And you don't have to worry about how old it is, what temperature it is, etc.

Make sure you bring food for yourself, even if you are planning on eating in the airport--you might be so pressed for time that you don't get a chance to eat, and thus are stuck, starving on a plane for hours. Whatever you bring, make sure it's something simple that you could eat with one hand...it's hard to eat with a baby in your lap grabbing at your food.

On a related note, I discovered that it's a good idea to ask for a lid for any drinks you order. Since you can't use the tray table with a baby in your lap, you really need a little extra insurance to keep the contents in the cup that you will almost inevitably have to sit on the floor.

As for water, stock up before you get on the plane. Since I'm cheap, I just bring empty plastic bottles and fill up in a water fountain before I board. Of course you can buy them as well. Sure the flight attendants can bring you water once you're on the plane--if they have time. I don't take a chance because I always get super dehydrated, or need it for the baby.

Novelty: Just being on a plane was entertainment enough for quite a while. However, it doesn't hurt to bring a mix of some familiar classics as well as some me new toys the baby hasn't seen before. Just make sure they are things that will stay relatively stationary when dropped on the floor, and out of consideration for other passengers, relatively quiet.

The baby will probably cry at some point. For the most part, people will either be so busy listening to electronic gadgets they won't even notice. If someone does give you the stink-eye, just ignore them. After all, they were a baby once and someone had to put up with THEM. It seems to me that most people don't mind having babies on board, and many sympathetic souls will actually jump right in and help you if you need it (putting luggage overhead, entertaining your baby, etc). The grandmotherly types will be thrilled to make over your kid, and several delightful people entertained my babe long after I had run out of moves.

Babies are funny critters. Mine did far better on the plane for 9 hours than I would have predicted. He normally isn't much of a lap baby at home, but on the plane, he was just fine. I felt bad for him because he couldn't really move much, but he took it well. He did a fair amount of sleeping on the plane, but it was almost always right as we were going to land. He was oblivious of the descent and didn't even notice the bumping along on the run way or any of it. He spent a lot of time flirting with the other passengers, and generally took it all in stride. I'm guessing the older/more mobile the kid, the tougher it is for them to sit still for hours on a plane.

My last bit of advice is to wait until everyone else gets off the plane if you can. You really need a lot of time to gather up all your stuff, look for missing toys, and ensure that you can carry it all back off the plane. Plus, the flight attendants can help you with the carrying. It's kind of nice to have the ramp to yourself, and not be in a hurry. Besides, if anything, you should have long since given up notions of getting anywhere in a timely fashion with a babe in tow.