walking towards tomorrow

making another stab at getting ready to go get on with the whole graduate school gig, i got it rolling with an academic advising appointment this afternoon.

these things never go quite how you plan...there's always new variables popping up like mushrooms after a week of rain. but someone shined a light into my dark hole of doubt and confusion. sometimes i think all i need is for someone to hold my hand and tell me it'll all be okay. i guess the bigger question is would i have the sense to believe them? my experiences with bureaucracy are always exhausting and soul draining. i wandered out of financial aid into the sun, and hopped on the first bus heading north. i figure they'll all get you close, at least most of the time.

the war really fucks people up. they really never let go do they? i see this over and over again in vietnam vets....and in the new generation of gulfwars survivors. so many wasted lives.

i like the reflective walk home. it's just long enough to get major issues resolved, but not so far as to be tiring. there's a lot to be said for not having it too easy. i wonder what i'd do without a good death march now and then.

tried to go to the dmv, now that an unprecedented number of proofs of address turned up in the mail...but alas they're closed on mondays. that still wouldn't solve the OTHER PROBLEM, but we're working on it. Question #488 Why do you need a driver's license as a condition of employment for city government when I live in one of few cities in Oregon where you DON'T need to drive ANYWHERE? The answer may be forthcoming from the crack of my ass. i may be walking towards tomorrow, but i still don't exist and i certainly don't need to drive there.

i wonder if somone would pay me to teach them japanese? or do puppet shows about composting? i can only hope so.

quote of the day: brian says, "don't worry. i promise you they want your money."