dyslexia, dl, dmv, disappoint, deviate, discourse

deviate: “...our ordinary state of consciousness is as far from...reality as sleep is from waking...
hmm i wonder if this explains why i tend to blank out in ordinary moments and drift off into another dimension while going about completely normal business? (or does this just mean i'm a glorified space cadet?)
it's brought to my attention regularly by third parties that i'm definitely not in the same dimension as they are. so i guess this means that not everybody drifts away into more esoteric thoughts while walking down the street. am i really on to something while everyone else is "trapped in the matrix" so to speak? i can't help but wonder.
it's amazingly easy to disassociate myself completely from my surroundings, or experience mundane things far more deeply than the people around me.

dl: after a lot of pain and suffering i finally got a new driver's license. the dmv is one of those places that you can really experience the spectrum of humanity. kinda like dhs. or other government offices whose acronyms might also start with d. the kinds of places where you can feel your soul being sucked away the minute you walk through the door into the hell of flourescent lights, crying babies and the unwashed.
i would like to think i won't have to go through anything this challenging for years, but unfortunately i suspect that being in school will in fact prove to be just as bureaucratically flavortastic as my ongoing experiences with the offices of automobile related autocracies. joy.

dyslexia: is what i think i have when i'm typing things and they come out all wrong. other times i think i should just shut up and resist the urge to say every little thing that pops into my head. i'm sure everyone thinks i'm weird enough without committing it to posterity.

discourse: most of the time you really don't want to talk to the kinds of people you run into on public transit in the middle of the afternoon. but this one was an exception.
actually i've had a statistically significant number of short but meaningful conversations with many people in this city while riding the bus, come to think of it. i'm not sure how to interpret this phenomenon except to assume that maybe it has to do with the fact that it's an ongoing thing...people generally like to talk to me whether or not they really should, and that i'm just getting better than average quality conversation material. i really just don't know. does anyone else have this problem?
frankly though, as long as you aren't asking me for money or trying to hook up, i'm perfectly happy talking to you. we can have completely different views on things, and that's cool. i like variety.

disappoint: so i didn't get the job i really really wanted. the one where i could have done puppetshows for kids about recycling and composting. sigh. it would have been sooo cool. well i hope whoever did get it appreciates how cool that is.
as for me...i don't know what i'm going to do, but i'm trying to stick with something relevant to my field of educationally related endeavors. an esl gig would be nice. or something where i get to work with highschool kids. but when you get right down to it, i'd probably end up working at fedex or something.
let's face it, i need money and the more i need it, the less choosey i get about the where and the how of it. short of prostitution and drugs, i'm usually desperate enough to try anything.
but really i'm really good at teaching and hope i can find someone that appreciates just how good i am at it and will pay me accordingly. i think i deserve it at this point.

well, today's been incredibly strange overall. maybe things will get normal now that the full moon is waning. on the plus side, the kale and chard are up. they're cute! i hope we have lots of lovely greens to eat this winter when the cold rainy times are upon us. and let's hope that at that time i also have a place in the world where i belong.